- mummy in the baking
- This blog is about me and my voyage to becoming a mummy. Ironically called “mummy in the baking” as together with my passion and obsession for all things cake related, I will never be able to have my own "bun in the oven." Years of fertility treatment have taken their toll and I now find myself on a new..eek, i hate this word...journey! The crazy train to adoption. I hope you will join me while I bake my way to becoming a mummy. I want this blog to be a source of information as well as a comforter. I hope it will inspire and help anyone who is considering adoption or who has in fact already bought their ticket for this..here I go again...journey. Cake makes me happy and I hope you will enjoy sharing my love of it. I want it to help lift your spirits and hearts through what can only be described as 'the trials and tribulations of the adoption process.' Along with my desire to be a family, I love my dogs, have an unhealthy love of sausages and chenin blanc, adore my land rover uber-nerd of a husband and continiously dream of balmy summer evenings. Baking in progress…..
Friday, 9 May 2014
Hindsight with a capital......H
Although LRUN is in the dog box for forgetting to buy me an Easter egg (I mean seriously...who does that?) he wins me over by taking a big chunk of time off work for us to have true quality time as a family. It does LBM the world of good and reminds him just how much fun daddy can be. Grandad comes over for a few days too and although LBM is shy at first, he soon cautiously warms to him and we have a very positive few days. But holidays must come to an end and I am dreading that first morning being back alone again. On our way downstairs LBM stops dead in his toddle and peeks into our bedroom. He makes a questioning gurgle. He is looking for LRUN. He keeps peering further and further into the room while I try and explain that daddy has gone back to work and that he'll see him tonight. I will admit, I'm fighting the tears. Just look how far we've come.
I think it has a lot to do with his new found independence. His walking is coming on leaps and bounds. In fact, he is actually choosing to walk now rather than the obligatory speed crawl. And his arms are slowly dropping. Kinda more Tai Chi class than Zumba now. There is a lot of pre-verbal babble going on but the health visitors are still concerned about his development and we have a big test scheduled for next week. How do I feel about this? Give the little guy a chance please. Sure, ok he is developmentally delayed. But he has spent the last few months channelling all his precious energy into grieving for the loss of his foster carer, the loss of his tummy mummy, attaching to me and learning to trust LRUN all over again. The last thing on his mind was meeting his developmental milestones. He was just focusing on dealing with the turmoil of his emotions. I always remember people saying that on placing a child, you should go back a few steps. Really treat them like a baby. Start the last chapter over again. I didn't see the significance of this until now. And now it's obvious. LBM regressed massively when he joined us and if we had treated him more like a baby at the time, perhaps he would have settled better. Hindsight is a wonderful thing.