Daffodils and deadlines....
I spotted something in the garden this morning. There peaking through the dark, dismal mud and mulch was the first sprouting of a daffodil bulb. Oh how happy this has made me. A mere glimmer of the spring to come. Even the man in the watch tower down in the marina stopped me the other day. He said, "You're a die hard little soul. No matter the weather, you are always out there with your buggy and the dogs, battling the elements." But that's what it's all about it. Keeping the LBM out and about and busy. Food is still a major frustration for both of us and every day we face new challenges to manage it. It's harder when we are with other children, as I realise then just how much he does eat compared to them. And in fact, if one more person tells me he is fat, I fear I will actually punch them. But the look on his little face today, multi-tasking while munching on a stick of celery and whizzing around on his baby walker was just too precious.
Miss Scarlett popped in and despite his emotional distress, she was happy with him. It's amazing how relaxed he is with her. Then again, she is his social worker and she has been there for him since day one.
Just as LBM is settling in for his afternoon nap, Miss Delia calls. At first I feel it is just for a chat and a catch up. I am very fond of her and she is so unbelievably encouraging. But she reveals this call has a purpose. We have until the 23rd Jan to decide on Jelly-Tot. Gulp. Why am I so torn on this? This is what we always wanted right? Right? Everyone else in the world manages with more than one child. I guess I am just panicking. I am on my own for long hours in the day with no family near for support. Sure, we have friends but these friends have their own lives and commitments. Practically and financially it makes no sense. Emotionally...well, that's a whole different story.
In other news, LBM was so much better with LRUN on Sunday that I managed to make a cake. Apples again I'm afraid. A long story but we have a batch that need using. So I rustle up one of my all time favourites. A good standby. The Dorset Apple cake. Subtly scented with fresh lemon that lifts it to a whole new level. Simply sublime.
- mummy in the baking
- This blog is about me and my voyage to becoming a mummy. Ironically called “mummy in the baking” as together with my passion and obsession for all things cake related, I will never be able to have my own "bun in the oven." Years of fertility treatment have taken their toll and I now find myself on a new..eek, i hate this word...journey! The crazy train to adoption. I hope you will join me while I bake my way to becoming a mummy. I want this blog to be a source of information as well as a comforter. I hope it will inspire and help anyone who is considering adoption or who has in fact already bought their ticket for this..here I go again...journey. Cake makes me happy and I hope you will enjoy sharing my love of it. I want it to help lift your spirits and hearts through what can only be described as 'the trials and tribulations of the adoption process.' Along with my desire to be a family, I love my dogs, have an unhealthy love of sausages and chenin blanc, adore my land rover uber-nerd of a husband and continiously dream of balmy summer evenings. Baking in progress…..